The funny thing is, this isn't the first time I have had to start over. It just feels like that, every time.
So where does one start?
1.Start
What is lost is lost. So just start. I started by getting my broadband connection set up @home again. Its been a while since I needed a wi-fi at home, but now that I am going to be writing again and doing a lot of things, again, I need speed, again.
2. One Thing At A Time
I am a big fan of GTD+Focus+Minimalism (explains my need to find something like this platform to write on) but really, taking one thing at a time is so bloody good.
I don’t think about the 297 emails in my inbox, not the 876 ideas I have generated in the last week, I am just trying to do one thing at a time.
I was searching for a new blogging tool, found this, liked it, started. Hence the 1.Start. Always, just Start.
3. Vow To Do So Much Better
This time, I told myself, it will be better. Whatever it is that you starting again, do not let yourself get lulled into creating a replica of what you had.
Lost a company? create a sexier one.
Lost a relationship? nurture a more engaging one.
Lost a job? find a better one.
Just vow to do better this time. Version 2.0 has to be better than ver 1.0
4. Take Your Time
Do it right.
Taking your time, does not mean, paralysis by fear. taking your time, makes sure, you learn from your mistakes, misadventures and even your successes.
Reflect, gather, focus, vow, then sow.
5. Learn
It is mandatory to say, learn from your mistakes. I am asking you to learn from your successes as well. Oh come on, it may have not worked out, but there must be some nuggets of awesomeness in it?
What were they?
More importantly, what did it make you feel?
What were the tasks that you hated? Can you remove them or reduce them in your new endeavour?
What did you absolutely love? Can you do more of that now?
6. Reasonable Detachment — Safe Distance
This time around, I am going to inbuilt into my design a relative degree of ‘I don’t care’
Strange to say that for a labour of love, but one cannot allow oneself to hurt so bad. Does that mean you numb yourself? No, on the contrary, heighten your senses, feel the ecstasy a little more, but know, that nothing is permanent.
7. Remember You Have Done This Once Already
That’s why you are here. Funny, how the first time around, I wasn’t even remotely scared. I just believed it would all work out, that I my firm/project would outlast me, that my relationship would see me getting old with my loved one, that my paycheck would keep increasing over time.
The second time around (in some cases third & more ) it seems more plausible that I will fail.
But what I tell myself is this, I did succeed, albeit for a wee bit of time, but I did. I rode the dragon once, it has to be easier this time around, I know the dragon!
8. Spell Out Your Success
Do this in advance. In some cases, I did not know a good thing when I had it, in others they didnt. Either way, since I did not know what I would consider good enough, or to push it higher, awesome, I did not know when to go down on my knees and thank. I wanted more, better, faster, greater, sexier, happier, richer etcer (all ers and then some more, er)
This time, I am telling myself way in advance, what I am going to consider a success and when I reach that milestone/goal, I am going to celebrate.
9. Question
I am beginning to see my skills, situation, limitations, knowledge, expertise in a whole new way. I am questioning a lot of it and whereever and whenever I find a gap, I am going to fill it.
In the amazing opportunity provided to create again, I am going to learn and add a lot to myself.
10. Accept
Lastly, accept.
It took me a while (I was in denial for over 3 months) to accept, but finally when I did, it felt like rain on a parched dessert floor.
Accept the reality, the truth, the loss, the opportunity, but what you need to accept most of all is the responsibility.
Accept you are Response Able and make it happen.
This time, Eden.
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